It’s time to talk about bin rage.
This concept is, it’s fair to say, a bedrock of life for me and Waawo-ette senior. Well, being on the lookout for it, and avoiding it all costs.
What is bin rage, I hear you cry?
Well, bin rage is the rage you fly into when you realise you’ve got to empty the bin again. It’s what causes you to speak to your partner the way you’d never speak to anyone else. Snide, sarcastic remarks. Passive aggressiveness.
I’ll just do the washing up should I?
Bin rage seems to stem from the fact that a lot of people are together who really shouldn’t be. This hooks back to the last post too, because it seems like a lot of people not only can’t get along with themselves, they can’t get along with their significant other either.
Why not leave them? Really, just leave. Over on Mumsnet’s AIBU [“Am I Being Unreasonable?”] and Relationships forums, an oft quoted motto is “LTB” for “Leave the bastard” – so much so that it’s become a running joke. But the LTBers are right in a way. So many of the posts on those forums are describing classic bin rage – and there really is no way back.
From the first signs of bin rage appearing, it won’t be long until you can’t stand the way your partner eats, talks, breathes – how can anyone enjoy a life of such constant misery? Some people just don’t get along – but for whatever reason, are bumping along together, whether it’s because of kids, houses, or just convenience. Many years ago I remember a professor of behavioural science expounding how most people are with the person they’re with because they were with that person yesterday… and the day before… and so on and so on, for years, lifetimes.
Such a depressing thought.
Some examples of really bin ragey behaviour:
- Organising work nights out specifically to avoid spending time with your partner;
- Spending an inordinate amount of time and money on hobbies that don’t involve your partner;
- Spending your time at the opposite end of the house to your partner.
There are loads more. The thing is, it’s been seven years since I was in a bin rage relationship and I’m actually having trouble remembering any.
You might, of course, put off the critical phase of bin rage. Long winded planning for an extravagant wedding is one way. Having a baby, buying a new house – all potentially will stave off encroaching bin rage. But be warned: nothing works forever. If you’re saddled to someone you don’t like, the truth will out. And please don’t suggest counselling (but that’s another post, for another day).
[Picture: the actual bin that inspired the name “bin rage” – although this was in a shared house when I was single, so oddly enough it wasn’t classic bin rage that I was suffering through then.]
And no, nothing to do with wheely-bins! (I’ve just googled, who knew green and black bins with wheels cause so many arguments? Although…)
I’ll just put the bin out then should I?